EPISODE TEN
"You weren't satisfying him!" Cassidy screamed at me.
I couldn't believe it.
I had stopped talking to her, after that night I caught her with my boyfriend.
I was still finding it very hard to believe.
This was my best friend from childhood, my adviser, the only person I thought I could trust.
I didn't want to even see her face or hear her voice. She irritated me but to my surprise, she kept stalking me around.
She kept asking to explain but I was too pained to listen to anything.
She finally held me in Debra's house.
I wanted to send her out but she begged to explain.
I wanted to ear even though I was pained and felt betrayed.
Like, I had to know why no one else but my best friend, confidant, adviser, would hurt me this way.
But the first words I heard almost made me run mad with anger.
"You weren't satisfying him" she repeated.
"You don't give him that great satisfaction, like... Do you understand what I'm saying?" She asked me.
I couldn't comprehend it.
I wanted to kill her, I wanted to hurt her, to make her feel what I was feeling.
But she was blaming me.
I wasn't satisfying Dare...
As usual, a part of me started doubting, probably what she's saying is true.
Probably, the problem is with me, I am imperfect.
She shrugged.
"So you were helping me out?" I asked with disbelief.
"Don't be so dumb Gloria! It was a mistake. I... I went there to see you and then it just happened. I am sorry!"
I didn't want to believe her but she started crying and even knelt down.
"I am your best friend. I will never do that to you! Please forgive me Gloria! It was a mistake..." She kept begging as I cried.
She was my best friend.
Maybe I was the one exaggerating it all.
It was a mistake. It was a mistake. I kept telling myself.
"I could teach you, if you want" she told me and don't hate me... I forgave her.
***
I accepted Dare after countless apologies.
It took a long time though but then I forgave him.
He promised to be faithful and I felt at peace.
He showered me with gifts, money, attention.
It was a mistake. A silly mistake.
I kept telling myself for months, everytime I remembered.
Moreover, Dare was proving to be faithful.
I was contented.
I was also scared of loosing him. He was my life, he meant the world to me. I love him and I don't think I can ever love anyone like him, ever again.
I became pregnant again so I decided to keep it.
I didn't tell anyone, even Cassidy. I couldn't trust anyone again.
She guessed though and kept prodding me but I lied to her.
If I had his child, he would never leave me.
You can't blame me. I was desperate.
There were lot of girls around Dare. I kept thinking he would leave me. I couldn't loose him to anyone. He was my life.
You can't understand but my life was built around Dare.
I had done a lot for him to just wake up one morning and not have him again.
I was ready to have his child alone.
He would marry me and I would have him forever.
Dare asked me one night.
"Are you pregnant?"
I was surprised. He had never noticed even the previous ones. I wasn't even yet showing.
How on Earth could he even think it?
"No" I lied.
He smiled and hugged me.
I kept the child.
He never asked again.
It was going to four months.
I was glad. I would have his child, whether he wanted or not.
Dare was loving than ever. We were back to our normal life.
Dare made me happy. He was funny and romantic.
We both stayed in and had this romantic dinner. He bought champagne and cooked for us.
He had set the table so beautifully, there was flowers everywhere.
I screamed as soon as I entered and saw everything. I hugged him and he led me to the table.
Dare was also a very good cook.
It was the best night ever.
We ate, laughed, talked and drank.
I started feeling tired. It had been a very long day for me.
I yawned like a cute cat.
He laughed "How are you feeling?" He asked.
I smiled "Sleepy" I grumbled.
He held my hand and kissed my palm. I felt like a princess.
He looked into my eyes and smiled.
I smiled back and...
All of a sudden I felt something sharp in my tummy.
"Do you feel any pain?" He asked with a smile.
I wondered how he knew I was in pain.
I tried to laugh it off but another tearing pain took me and I screamed.
My belly went on fire.
Dare was watching me as he drank his champagne.
"How do you feel?" He asked again.
I groaned. I couldn't believe it.
Blood started to flow. I was loosing my baby and I was in pain.
"Dare!" I glared at him.
He just drank and crossed his legs as he watched me with a smile.
"Dare..."
I felt dead.
I kept screaming and turning in pain as blood flowed and Dare stared at me with smiles and drank his wine... On and on...
"Dare!" I screamed.
It was his smile I saw last.
I gave up.
"You weren't satisfying him!" Cassidy screamed at me.
I couldn't believe it.
I had stopped talking to her, after that night I caught her with my boyfriend.
I was still finding it very hard to believe.
This was my best friend from childhood, my adviser, the only person I thought I could trust.
I didn't want to even see her face or hear her voice. She irritated me but to my surprise, she kept stalking me around.
She kept asking to explain but I was too pained to listen to anything.
She finally held me in Debra's house.
I wanted to send her out but she begged to explain.
I wanted to ear even though I was pained and felt betrayed.
Like, I had to know why no one else but my best friend, confidant, adviser, would hurt me this way.
But the first words I heard almost made me run mad with anger.
"You weren't satisfying him" she repeated.
"You don't give him that great satisfaction, like... Do you understand what I'm saying?" She asked me.
I couldn't comprehend it.
I wanted to kill her, I wanted to hurt her, to make her feel what I was feeling.
But she was blaming me.
I wasn't satisfying Dare...
As usual, a part of me started doubting, probably what she's saying is true.
Probably, the problem is with me, I am imperfect.
She shrugged.
"So you were helping me out?" I asked with disbelief.
"Don't be so dumb Gloria! It was a mistake. I... I went there to see you and then it just happened. I am sorry!"
I didn't want to believe her but she started crying and even knelt down.
"I am your best friend. I will never do that to you! Please forgive me Gloria! It was a mistake..." She kept begging as I cried.
She was my best friend.
Maybe I was the one exaggerating it all.
It was a mistake. It was a mistake. I kept telling myself.
"I could teach you, if you want" she told me and don't hate me... I forgave her.
***
I accepted Dare after countless apologies.
It took a long time though but then I forgave him.
He promised to be faithful and I felt at peace.
He showered me with gifts, money, attention.
It was a mistake. A silly mistake.
I kept telling myself for months, everytime I remembered.
Moreover, Dare was proving to be faithful.
I was contented.
I was also scared of loosing him. He was my life, he meant the world to me. I love him and I don't think I can ever love anyone like him, ever again.
I became pregnant again so I decided to keep it.
I didn't tell anyone, even Cassidy. I couldn't trust anyone again.
She guessed though and kept prodding me but I lied to her.
If I had his child, he would never leave me.
You can't blame me. I was desperate.
There were lot of girls around Dare. I kept thinking he would leave me. I couldn't loose him to anyone. He was my life.
You can't understand but my life was built around Dare.
I had done a lot for him to just wake up one morning and not have him again.
I was ready to have his child alone.
He would marry me and I would have him forever.
Dare asked me one night.
"Are you pregnant?"
I was surprised. He had never noticed even the previous ones. I wasn't even yet showing.
How on Earth could he even think it?
"No" I lied.
He smiled and hugged me.
I kept the child.
He never asked again.
It was going to four months.
I was glad. I would have his child, whether he wanted or not.
Dare was loving than ever. We were back to our normal life.
Dare made me happy. He was funny and romantic.
We both stayed in and had this romantic dinner. He bought champagne and cooked for us.
He had set the table so beautifully, there was flowers everywhere.
I screamed as soon as I entered and saw everything. I hugged him and he led me to the table.
Dare was also a very good cook.
It was the best night ever.
We ate, laughed, talked and drank.
I started feeling tired. It had been a very long day for me.
I yawned like a cute cat.
He laughed "How are you feeling?" He asked.
I smiled "Sleepy" I grumbled.
He held my hand and kissed my palm. I felt like a princess.
He looked into my eyes and smiled.
I smiled back and...
All of a sudden I felt something sharp in my tummy.
"Do you feel any pain?" He asked with a smile.
I wondered how he knew I was in pain.
I tried to laugh it off but another tearing pain took me and I screamed.
My belly went on fire.
Dare was watching me as he drank his champagne.
"How do you feel?" He asked again.
I groaned. I couldn't believe it.
Blood started to flow. I was loosing my baby and I was in pain.
"Dare!" I glared at him.
He just drank and crossed his legs as he watched me with a smile.
"Dare..."
I felt dead.
I kept screaming and turning in pain as blood flowed and Dare stared at me with smiles and drank his wine... On and on...
"Dare!" I screamed.
It was his smile I saw last.
I gave up.
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